11 26 am pst   [ (over)analyzing ]

Darren wrote to tell me I was overanalyzing. He is, of course, correct. That's the problem with this beast. I [over]analyze everything. I write every day, and that means that I pour over my experiences. Often my memory bends and contorts the truths. In addition, everything is filtered through my own experience and perception.

I try to report as accurately as possible. I have determined that this document should be as much of my reality as I can scribble down each day, but it will never be the whole truth and nothing but.

3 00 pm pst   [ two conversations ]

(one):

"Michelle would make a better dominatrix than you." Matthew was talking about his ex-girlfriend.

I wheeled around. "Oh really?" I raised my eyebrows and put my hands on my hips.

"She is a foot taller than you." He can already tell this is a losing battle.

"Have you ever seen me with a whip in my hand?" There is fire in my eyes.

"No," he concedes. That was the end of that subject.

(two):

"Ok, be serious for a moment. You have to tell me the truth."

"Alright," Darren agreed.

"On a scale of one to ten, how does my ass rate?"

He burst out laughing. I was serious. Matthew is a consummate breast man, and I've never met any other guy who was really into butts, so I had to know how mine stacked up. I never look at it; I've never considered it. Now, here before me, I had an expert. "Is it like a four?" I looked straight into his eyes.

"Oh, no," he quickly disagreed. After considering for a minute he declared, "a seven or an eight."

I considered that. He read the though on my face. "How do you feel now that you know?" He was checking I wasn't upset.

"Informed." I smiled.

11 47 pm pst   [ shoot me ]

I asked Matthew to take some pictures of me. I was still feeling the buldge of stuffing myself at Chevys. Matthew, his mom, and I had an early dinner at the Encino location (rated number 5 according to the Shrine to Chevys).

The outing was really lovely -- the weather being superb and the grande tita being extra limey.

I told Matthew tonight I had a bigger sex drive than him. He answered, "We're not even having this discussion." I thought he was disagreeing, but he quickly explained that there was no doubt.

two years ago today: "I think 11 hours has been enough space for both of us."

one year ago today: "I chose to do the most embarrassing and revealing project that I could manage."

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