10 14 am pdt [ strange nights in the city ]
Last night was odd -- not bad-odd, just odd. Matthew
came home fairly evening so that he would have time to get ready for our
night out. We were going to celebrate Ethan's girlfriend Katie's birthday with a dozen people by riding
around San Francisco from bar to club in a limo. We met at the apartment
of Lacey and Jake (both of whom I had
met last year) for cake and ice cream. I did my best to memorize
everyone's name:
Ethan & Katie
Jake & Lacey
Stephanie & Mike
Havier
Carlos
Klaus, visiting from Germany
After a while, we went downstairs to get in "the cabs"
and surprised Katie with her ride for the evening. Our driver's name was
Eric, and he was from Russia, so I had him teach me hello, yes, no,
please, thank you, and you're welcome throughout the evening. The only
ones I remember are yes (dada), no (niet), and thank you
(phonetically: spah-seeboh), which I got a lot of use from
throughout the evening. We also made Klaus give us German lessons.
In the cab I looked at Matthew. "How did I wind up the
only girl in a dress?"
"That is strange, huh?"
"Yes."
Already I've managed to forget where we went; I didn't
catch the names of some of the places. Bars aren't especially interesting
to me, unless I can dance.
At the first bar the bartender looked really grouchy,
so I borrowed a pen and wrote a little message on the inside of a
matchbook about smiling and pretending to have fun. Then, since the
person I borrowed the pen from was nowhere to be see, I opened up another
matchbook and wrote, "See Rachel's Daily Diary: www.reinyday.com", then I
closed up the matchbook and placed it back in its dish.
"So, you have to explain this dating thing to
me," Klaus insisted, after I brought it up. "In Germany, you go to
a club. You find a woman, and she's got the biggest fucking drink
and you're thirsty. So you go over and you make the eyes at her and you
take a sip. Then you ask her to buy you a drink.
Matthew is shaking the building with laughter at this
point and he announces that Klaus has the best puppy-dog look he's ever
seen.
We went all over North Beach, with a "smoking" stop at
Crissy Fields, but my favorite place was the last one we were at. When we
got there, I headed for the bathroom. As I was waiting in line, O.P.P by
Naughty By Nature comes on. I start rapping:
O.P.P., how can I explain it?
I'll take you frame by frame it,
To have y'all jumpin' shall we singin' it.
O is for Other, P is for People, scratch your temple,
The last P...well...that's not that simple.
It's sorta like ah...well...another way to call a cat a kitty.
There's five little letters that are missin' here.
You get it on occassion if the other party is a gamin'.
It seems I gotta start the explainin',
Bust it
The women in line slowly shifted their expressions from
annoyance to amazement.
"I can't believe you know all the lyrics!"
Now for the ladies, O.P.P. means something gifted.
The first two letters are the same but the last is something
different.
It's the longest, loveliest, lean -- I call it the leanest.
It's another five letter word rhymin' with cleanest and meanest.
I won't get into that, I'll do it...ah...sorta properly.
I say the last P...hmmm...stands for property.
Now lady here comes a kiss, blow a kiss back to me, now tell me
exactly...
When I finally got to use the bathroom, one of the two
females that had been in it before me said, "Have fun!" I though that a
rather strange thing to say to someone in a bathroom. When I finished the
female after me said, "Wow, that was fast!" I smiled in response.
There were ledges on the dance floor, the height of one
stair, so I stood on one and faced Matthew, who stood on the floor, and I
reveled in being taller than him as we danced the night away to a
fantastic selection of music.
I started losing my patience in the limo ride back. I
don't find people who are stupid drunks to be very amusing. I made my
good-byes quickly and was happy to head home to a warm shower and full
plate of Tater-Tots.